6 Types of Expectations to Let Go Of
Expectations fill our days, sometimes subtly and other times loud and clear. Healthy expectations can lead to purposeful productivity, balanced relationships, and sustainable schedules.
But unhealthy expectations can lead to pressure, stress, and burnout quicker than anything else. Here are six types of expectations to let go of so that you can stress less and be your best.
#1: Everyone Else’s Expectations
No human being–no matter how smart, talented, and high achieving–can meet everyone else’s expectations, but there are people who try. If you are trying to keep everyone around you satisfied by doing everything they all ask of you at the level they expect of you, you will feel pulled in so many directions and probably end up not meeting anyone’s expectations in the long run.
Instead of trying to be everything to everyone, set your own priorities and goals, and work with other people based on what matters to both of you.
#2: Your Assumption of Other People’s Expectations
When you assume you know what someone else expects, it adds extra pressure because you’re trying to accomplish a task that wasn’t actually assigned. You have no details or parameters, so your brain is trying to fill in those gaps as well as meet the assumed expectation. And the results can be disastrous if your assumption was incorrect.
If something is unclear, ask some questions. Communication is key!
#3: Your Expectation That Other People Will Do Things The Way You Would
When you expect someone else to act or do something the way you would do it, you are assuming they have the same experience, background, personality, and thought process as you. That’s very rarely the case! One of the beautiful things about working with other people is that you get to see how differently people problem-solve and get things done. There usually isn’t just one right way to do things.
If you do want something done just the way you would do it, make that clear from the start. If you’re in charge of something and are responsible for the outcome, it might make sense to lay out not just the task but the whole process for someone else to follow.
#4: Your Expectations of Perfection
You’re pretty amazing, but you’re not perfect. No one is!
When you expect perfection in yourself, your spouse, your kids, your friends, and your co-workers, you are setting yourself up for disappointment. Choose to value progress instead of perfection for yourself and for others. When mistakes are made or mess-ups happen, work through them knowing that you’re making progress.
#5: The “Do-It-All” Expectation
The world will keep whispering (and sometimes shouting) to you that you should be able to do it all–be a great mom, wife, business owner, friend. Take your kids to the zoo, try a new recipe for dinner, do all the laundry, clean the house, grow your company, host a client dinner, read a book, have a date night, walk the dog, do yoga, meet a friend for coffee, have your hair done, coach your kid’s basketball team. The list goes on and on. Oh, and be sure to get a good night’s sleep!
Social media makes it look like everyone else has it all together, and Pinterest tells us how to make it all look good. The truth is that no one can do it all or have it all. It’s not a matter of being a working mom. It’s a matter of being human. We all have limitations. You have to decide what actually matters to you and do those things well instead of trying to everything haphazardly.
#6: The Expectation That Things Will “Just” Improve
Have you ever told yourself that things will just get better after a certain point?
“Things will slow down after the holidays.”
“Work will get better after this big presentation is over.”
“We’ll have more family time once basketball season ends.”
But it never happens. Instead, something else comes up and the cycle starts all over. Your schedule will stay busy, your workload will stay full, and your family will stay scattered until you intentionally make a change.
If you’re ready to start making those intentional changes, grab my free guide: 24 Habits That Will Change Your Life!
